I've been super busy since I got back. Took a couple of days to relax with Jer and try to get over jet-lag, and now I am back at work and it is crazy busy. They rearranged the office while I was gone, so I came back to a new cubicle and boxes everywhere. And since I am busy with actual clients and work, I still haven't finished unpacking.
Haven't finished unpacking at home either. Well, the bags are empty, but most of the contents haven't made it past the floor or the laundry basket. In my defense, there have been people staying at my house who have been taking over the bathroom and the washing machine, and so I haven't been home much because it is too crazy there. I like clean, organized homes, and you can tell how busy or stressed I am by how messy my room is. Right now it looks like a tornado came through, and the kitchen looks worse (but that is not my fault!)
And of course, what I really want to do in the midst of this insanity is plan my wedding. Well, actually, I really want it to just be planned so I can relax. I am a get-it-done-right-away person, so a big to-do list with a million questions on it throws me into workaholic overdrive and all I think about night and day is how to word the invitations and what kind of food we should have and which flowers should be in my bouquet and whether or not we should have worship music and and and and. My biggest frustration is that when I am trying to make time to just relax and enjoy people, my mind is still going a million miles a minute, and I can feel it churning through all those questions. I know that in reality I have plenty of time, and should not worry, but my natural reaction is to drop everything and focus on getting it all done NOW.
I'm trying to moderate myself, and find a healthy schedule, with the right balance of sleep, fun, and getting stuff done. Haven't found that this week. Maybe in August. Maybe in November. Who knows. I've survived busier, crazier times than this, for sure. But I don't want my life to be one big crazy season after another. My pastor has been writing about making time for Sabbath and having a good rhythm, and I really agree with that idea, and know that it has been good for me in the past to have that. And I know that God was calling me to slow down and rest and not take on a lot of responsibility for the next year or so, and just enjoy life and people. I hope I can figure out how to do that, even with this wedding checklist hanging over me.
I promise I'll get pics of Europe and a few highlights from my trip up soon. It was a wonderful adventure and I loved it, and got a lot of sleep and physical activity and beautiful photos and fabulous memories. Stay tuned...